More valuable than a precious, pumping fart.
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JetsamArchives
> April 2005 > May 2005 > June 2005 > July 2005 > August 2005 > September 2005 > October 2005 > November 2005 > December 2005 > January 2006 > March 2006 Previous Posts> handwritten> Grogblogging II - the morning after > the Bird and the bees > Kath & Kim not funny? Get the hell out of my coun... > crap day SOC > and so he shoved it in the toaster!!! ahahahahaha... > Dis blawg ish gud shyt > embarrassmo! > busy busy busy > my sense of humour's a little skewiff
AdageAll that rot
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my futureI'm considering taking up further study in the nearish future. Old faithfuls know that I ran away from home at 16, and therefore didn't finish highschool. That's something I'm looking to redo and complete in the next two years before C starts kindy. It's not something I'm proud of, but the ones who've read me long enough know that I didn't really have any other option.
It's what to do afterwards that's on my mind. At the moment, I'm working in pathology, with definite possibilities for working up the corporate ladder. While I love my job and the opportunities offered to grow upwards and outwards, my heart's not in it as far as it being a lifetime career is concerned. I'm looking into something to do with counselling/therapy. Specifically domestic abuse and rape, and the post-traumatic stress that inevitably comes along with it. You can click here for my experience. I decided to decline the offer for a rape counsellor during court proceedings, choosing instead to have my now ex-husband, M, sit in with me. While I don't regret that decision for one moment, I can only imagine how important these people are for survivors who have nobody to turn to. I've discussed this with people close to me and I've received mixed reactions: Main pro -- I've dealt with both first-hand. Main con -- I've dealt with both first-hand. I'm not saying I'm an expert on either subject, the psychological after-effects are still very much a part of my every-day life. Some days, it's more than overwhelming. One day, you can feel indomitable. The next, you feel like you have been stripped of your sexual identity. Sometimes, and I speak only for myself here, touch becomes shameful, and it's nearly impossible to make and maintain eye-contact in any situation on any given day. Having said that, though, I know I'm doing a lot better than some other people who've been through similar situations. I can't even begin to explain how much I've changed since the rape, but even harder to explain is how I've managed to turn this into a really positive force in my life. It may sound sick and twisted, but if this didn't happen to me, I wouldn't appreciate half the things I have now. Decisions, decisions. I've done everything backwards, and I've got plenty of time -- we all know I've done everything backwards up until this point. I know the drive will always be there - once I've thought things through and researched all options and I've chosen what to do, it's VERY difficult to dissuade me. I'm just wondering if that'll turn out to be a help or a hindrance if I decide to go down that road. While I'm definitely stubborn and ambitious enough, I don't want to waste my time backtracking. Once my decision is made, then it's full steam ahead. Opinions most welcome. |